JOHN 3:16

Before I accepted Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior, I didn’t had much appreciation or should I say understanding on this verse; though I heard about it but it didn't make an impact on me until such time I realized how much I needed God in my life.

It was in the year 2008 when I accepted Jesus, God placed me in a difficult situation where I was forced to contemplate on how I lived my life for 33 years; I knew there was a God (or many Gods),  I thought I believed in God, I thought I was worshipping  and serving Him through good works, only to realize when I looked back that I was only doing such to earn my way to heaven when my time comes,  but I was wrong! I realized, should good works is my ticket to heaven, Jesus died for nothing. 
In my 5 year journey as a Christian, the more I get to know Christ, the more John 3:16 creates a bigger impact not only in me but in my pursuit to obey Him. I may not be a parent yet, but I could not just imagine how painful it could have been to sacrifice His only Son to save His creations who have sinned against Him and deserving to be eternally in hell.

Jesus had gone through excruciating pain inside –out (emotionally, mentally and physically), He was humiliated, insulted, denied and scourged by lashing Cat-o-nine-tails for 39 times that literally ripped His skin and crowned Him with 1 to 2 inches reeds of thorns that was pressed so hard that according to scriptures it pierced His skull  to further intensify Christ’s undescribable pain,  but His obedience to His Father and love for us lead Him into facing the Romans’ most brutal punishment – Crucifixion.

Prior to the crucifixion, Jesus carried part of the cross weighing 75 to 125lbs for half a mile, without taking any sort of meal.  Then, when He finally reached Golgotha, Jesus was nailed through His wrist (if its on the palm it would most likely tear down once the cross was up) that it caused His wrist bone to dislocate while the nails were still tightly holding on the cross.  At that time, the Romans had discovered the Medial nerve located just above the wrist joint and the centre of the foot.  The weight of the body caused the nail to press against the nerve shooting horrific pain throughout the nerves of the body.  The art of crucifixion did not cause Jesus to lose a lot of blood but the pain was deeply and truly  agonising.  Jesus’ body would have sagged downwards, causing agonising pain and severe cramp on the arms, shoulders and chest. He would then have found it difficult to breathe and maybe in an attempt to buy some time, he would have pushed himself up by the nails in his feet and stretched his legs which would have enabled him to breathe, but at the same time caused unbearable pain. The weight of the body, pulling down on the outstretched arms and shoulders, would tend to fix the intercostal muscles in the position of inhalation. The only way the Jesus could have exhaled was to lift with his arms and push with his legs to hold himself up for a few seconds to allow the air to escape from his lungs. To avoid suffocation Jesus was forced to cause his own excruciating pain by putting more pressure on the medial nerves. It was only a matter of time before the Jesus’ heart failed and his lungs would fill with fluid.
Reference: http://donaldsona.tripod.com/index-24.html

I cannot imagine the pain of a Father staring on His only begotten Son facing a capital punishment only to save those who have betrayed Him of their sins, in order to give them/us the opportunity to be with Him in heaven. I can’t imagine how much God truly loves us that in spite of our sins, despite how we live our lives, He still wants us to be saved and be with Him in heaven.

Thank you Jesus for your obedience to the Father, thank you for saving us and thank you for loving us the way you do.

HEARTFELT REMINDER

Christianity is not about transportation but it’s about TRANSFORMATION.  God is in the business of transforming lives….

I am blessed to be part of Dr. Randy Dellosa’s  5 week life-coaching seminar not just because of the life coaching skills that he's imparting on us in order to reach out and help more people but as well as to the reminder of grace that I had when he made me a part in one of his training demo.

Last Saturday, he asked our group if there was anyone who attempted suicide or at least have thought of suicide at least once and to my surprise I was the only one who raised a hand.

3 ½ years ago, I almost committed suicide, weeks after I left my last corporate job, 2am I was driving around Makati-Mandaluyong bridge seriously thinking of hitting my car towards the railing with the hope that I would just fall in the river and die, if I remember it right, it took me quite a number of turns at the bridge island for I was looking for the right timing, ensuring that no stranger will be hurt and no car will be hit.  I was crying profusely while driving, questioning God, I was deeply hurt, confused, lost and felt that I had no one else to turn to nor no one would understand, was tired of clichés, and useless words that didn’t make any sense to me.  I was so full of myself then, I was only thinking of the pride that I can’t hold on to and the so-called corporate image that I created and lost, in my mind my corporate life was the only thing that I can call mine, I owned it, I worked hard for it and the only thing that can’t be taken away from me then I lost it….All I wanted was to die, so the pain would stop once my heart beats’ stops. But God had other plans for me…

Last Saturday, I went on a journey back to that part of my life, though I knew that it was just an exercise to demonstrate how the questions should be like when we do life-coaching but I wasn’t able to hold back, my voice cracked, I was shaking and tears started to fall…I can’t help but be reminded how lost I was, how alone I was, how empty I was, how lonely I was, I wore a mask,  my life then was an epitome of worldly living….I was reminded how I allowed myself to be trapped with busyness, relationships, money, material things or anything that the world can offer just to fill my inner despondencies. I’ve been dead a long time ago....way before I even knew it.

Now, looking back, I can’t help but thank the Lord over and over and over again and even I was forced to be in bed yesterday due to my fever, I can’t help but feel the joy inside me, tears of joy were falling, copiously; And even if I feel really weak yesterday, I had to get up and ensure that I won’t miss the Sunday vesper worship for I wanted to praise and worship the Lord and just thank Him endlessly for all the works that He’ve done and will be doing in my life.  My heart is truly, truly overwhelmed, tears were uncontrollably falling the whole time and I can’t help but say “Thank You, Lord, Thank you, Lord, Thank you, Lord,  Thank You Lord for your Grace”.

I thank the Lord for changing my life, my views, my perspective and my whole being; Life is truly, truly simply wonderful! In spite of life’s constant adversities, I can’t help but feel this unfathomable joy and assurance that no matter what, I will never, ever be alone and His presence alone in my life is more than sufficient.

When Dr. Dellosa asked me as to how can I describe how I think and feel after everything that happened?  I just gave him my most honest & heartfelt answer, “ I am joyful,  for I am Saved by Grace”


Ephesians 2:8-9
For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God— not by  good works, so that no one can boast